Privacy Policy
Effective immediately. Retroactively. And in perpetuity.
The authoritative privacy policy for all Specific Industries properties is maintained at specificindustries.com. View Terms of Use
Last updated: When you weren't looking. Version: 47.3 (we keep changing it)
1. Data Collection
By visiting this website, you agree that we collect everything. Your name, your email, your browsing history, your hopes, your dreams, your milk preferences (pig and otherwise), and the contents of your refrigerator. We don't actually have the technology to do most of this, but we appreciate your consent nonetheless.
2. How We Use Your Data
We use your data for the following purposes: marketing pig milk to you, marketing pig milk to people who look like you, marketing pig milk to people who live near you, and occasionally just looking at it and feeling powerful. We may also print your data out and use it as bedding for the pigs. The pigs enjoy sleeping on customer data. We don't know why.
3. Data Sharing
We share your data with our partners, which include: the pigs, Earl's neighbor Dave, a guy we met at a farmers market who seemed trustworthy, and anyone who asks nicely. We may also sell your data to fund our pig milk research. We will not feel bad about this.
4. Cookies
This website uses cookies. Not the delicious kind. The kind that track you across the internet like a clingy pig. By continuing to use this website, you agree to be followed by our cookies forever. There is no opt-out. There is only pig milk.
5. Your Rights
You have the right to request deletion of your data. We have the right to ignore that request. You have the right to be forgotten. The pigs, however, never forget. They remember every visitor. Every. Single. One.
6. Security
Your data is stored on a laptop in the barn. The laptop is password-protected. The password is "pigmilk123". We are aware this is not ideal. The barn does have a lock, but as mentioned on our careers page, the door doesn't close properly. We're working on it.
7. Changes to This Policy
We reserve the right to change this policy at any time, for any reason, without telling you. If you don't like it, you are welcome to stop drinking pig milk. But you won't. They never do.